Finding Strength in Sadness: When God Holds You Together

There are days when sadness feels too heavy to name.

Days when I’ve smiled through the ache, carried on through the silence, and wondered if God still saw me in the midst of it all.

But I’ve learned that sadness isn’t the absence of faith, it’s often where faith begins to deepen.

God doesn’t turn away from our pain. He sits in it with us, whispering peace into the very places that hurt the most.

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” ~ Psalm 34:18 (NIV)

When I was a little girl, I used to attend church with My mother and younger brother.

There was this man that was the keyboard player, he always cried Every Sunday during the Songs of Worship segment of the day. I giggled as a kid, I thought he was a paid Actor that cried on cue in order to get people to feel more emotion in the church.

Now as an adult, after life beat me up this bad, I see why he cried Every Sunday.

I cry all the time in prayer, I cry writing these blog posts, I cry thanking God for the wonders he did for my life. I cry and thank him for my child's existence and that I can still stand here today.

Story Time: How I Handled Rage With God

I had an argument with my Co-parent. He began to speak to me in a blind rage on the phone, I said I would no longer be an emotional punching bag and hung up.

After the phone call, when it set in, I felt an overwhelming amount of sadness. Tears flowed almost endlessly.

My phone rang almost 50 times then a cascade of text messages full of swear words popped up on one after the other.

I couldn't believe what I was going through. I complained to God, I vented, I told him his daughter is feeling tremendous sadness.

As much as my co-parent was fighting to have his child with new arrangements, I was fighting to keep my sanity, my boundaries were being crossed. This was a problem I felt only God could solve. So I flipped my phone over, got down on my knees, bent down, head on the floor, and prayed with tears in my eyes, recited psalms 91 over and over for protection. Constantly my phone rang, I ignored it and continued to pray to God on my knees to protect me. I prayed saying "Anyone that makes me bow my head down in tears to you, please also make them do the same".

By the time I got up, my co-parent said all he needed to say via text and had threatened to block me. He did. I thought, "its over, this must be God's answer. Seperation."

But i knew how unrealistic it was for that to happen. We shared a child, I had no choice but to be connected to this man through our child. If anything God gave me the break I needed from the despair. I was blocked for half a day.

I stopped responding in anger back, instead I followed God's way and cut off all that was not of him. There are so many verses in the Bible about anger. So I didn't engage in it.

"Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools." ~ Ecclesiastes 7:9 ( NIV)

I only responded to the messages about our child's day. I gave attention to what was important here and now. I ignored, the insults, the curse words and rage bait.

God was in control.

The situation solved itself with time. I wasn't hasty in answering back, I gave time for God to act. From then on I always made sure I consulted with him before I answered anything that was said to put me out of character.

God is so aware that we cannot trust ourselves, thats why He says to trust him. I understand now what that means. In moments where you cannot trust yourself, rely on God.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” ~ Isaiah 55:8–9 (NIV)

God gently reminds His people that His wisdom far exceeds human reasoning. What may not make sense now is still part of His perfect plan. It’s a call to trust beyond logic, to lean on faith instead of understanding.

I felt so grateful to have a God beside me that cares for me like this. He let me breathe, in moments like this where I feel helpless. I kept communication about the child's day like I wasn't cursed and sworn at all day.

It's amazing that as a co-parent we still have to deal with the person we are trying to heal from in these moments. I pray there won't be many battles like this in the future, but if there is then God will make me a warrior. I will be so mentally strong, so strong that nothing will break me.

The heaviness in my heart lifted a little after seeing what God done for me. My Dear Reader, please, no matter what, never carry other peoples feelings with you when your bag is already so heavy.

When I stopped thinking about how he felt in anger to say those things to me, I felt lighter. Like I released a pain that was never mine to carry.

Sometimes people will project how they feel about themselves onto you. The further I got from my co-parent's resentment, the more I could see that I wasn't at fault like he claimed I always was. In his eyes, I broke up the family, took our child and made him a father that couldn't live with his child every single day. I carried that burden with me along side my own feelings for a while. It made me feel so guilty. Without God, I probably would have carried that bag as far as I could until the owner of those feelings would release me. But instead, God released me from that guilt, he took what wasn't mine to carry and gave me warmth.

The craziest thing is looking back at the past, how did I live without God's presence? Now, I can't even imagine not talking to him for even a day. How comforting it is to have him hear me and see me. No one on this earth can truly understand you but the God that has been watching you grow. Even the things you want to hide, God sees it all.

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” ~ Psalm 73:26 (NIV)

Even when everything in me felt broken, God’s presence became the steady heartbeat beneath it all.

I had spent half my life searching for a love like this, I can't believe He was always there.

Now I fill my home with God's presence so I don't ever forget him for a moment. Bible verse stickers all over my desk, laptop, cupboards. Frames with verses that mean so much to me. Every day I get up and see how much effort God put into guiding me.

Letting God Meet Me in My Sadness

When I stopped trying to “fix” my sadness and started talking to God about it, something changed.

I didn’t suddenly become happy but I became held.

Here’s what that looked like for me:

    •    Prayer became raw honesty instead of perfect words.

    •    Tears became worship, because they were real.

    •    Silence became sacred, because even when I said nothing, God still understood.

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” ~ Psalm 147:3 (NIV)

God doesn’t rush our healing. He walks with us through it.

I feel like this is too many peoples story, I hope telling mine brings comfort to you. You are not alone in this. Know that the closer you get to God, the more He draws closer to you. In my room, on the floor, I felt God right beside me. I never really feel alone anymore. Theres a being that knows my heart and my future. He will never fail me when I am walking in his obedience. When you come out of that sadness, yes, there will be an end to it. You won't believe your strength. Just hold on a little longer. He sees you, He hears you, He loves you.

Strength Through God’s Presence

I used to think strength meant pushing through pain, pretending I was okay.

But now I see true strength as the courage to lean on God when I can’t stand on my own.

God’s strength isn’t loud or forceful it’s gentle, quiet, and unshakable.

It’s the peace that steadies your heart in the middle of chaos.

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’” — 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)

When I stopped trying to be my own source of strength, I finally found it in Him.

Reflection / Devotional Thought

Take a breath and ask yourself:

    •    Where have I been trying to carry my sadness alone?

    •    What would it look like to let God carry some of it today?

    •    How can I see my tears as a bridge — not a barrier — to His presence?

“Those who sow with tears will reap with songs of joy.” ~ Psalm 126:5 (NIV)

Sometimes sadness plants the seeds of our greatest strength.

Feel free to comment and subscribe below!

Much Love,

May.

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